Book of Secrets previously Changes of Worlds
by for.the.love.of.death
Summary: DM/HG. Hermione Granger has a book of secrets and one hell of a story to tell. Draco Malfoy wants to read that book. What happens when they find themselves in too deep to escape.Rated M for protection
1. Memories on the Hogwarts Express

A.N: this is my first fanfiction. I know that it seems kinda "been there done that" and thats exactly what i said when i started writing, but trust me, it gets very "oh bloody hell" later on. It gets quite interesting. Ill be updating soon okay.

DISCLAIMER: I'm not as smart as the amazing JK Rowling, so i don't own Harry Potter, she does.

* * *

Hermione lay down quietly in her bed. She couldn't help but wonder how her world would start changing. Things would be worlds different now.

**Changes of Worlds **

She couldn't tell what it was, but as she gazed upward towards her ceiling, she could feel that this, her seventh year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, would be different. A few days before, her letter had arrived from the school with an all too expected surprise that was only the beginning of the changes she could tell was happening.

**HOGWARTS SCHOOL **

_of _**WITCHCRAFT **_and _**WIZARDRY**

Dear Ms. Granger,

We are pleased to welcome you back to your seventh year at Hogwarts. We are also pleased to inform you that your hard work and dedication towards your studies has proven repeatedly that you are perfect for the position of Head Girl during this term. We sincerely hope that you would uphold the position and serve as an example to the students of the entire school.

You are to report to my office immediately following the feast and sorting ceremony.

Yours Sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall

_Headmistress _

A small badge fell out of the envelope. The Hogwarts crest was upon it, along with the words "_Head Girl"_. Through all of her major accomplishments, Hermione had never felt as proud as she did now, with the honor of being the Head Girl. Of course, no one else doubted that in her seventh year, she would be Head Girl. Who else would it be? Most certainly not that airheaded bint Pansy Parkinson. She had to chuckle at the thought of Parkinson being head girl.

Going through the rest of her mail, she saw that her closest friends, Harry Potter, yes, THE Harry Potter, and Ronald Weasley, had sent her a letter:

Hermione,

I can't believe we haven't been in touch all summer**. **How's it been? Well at any rate, Rom here has been bugging to write you, so we decided what better time to do it than now, near the end of summer, it's just like him to not be able to wait for you. By the way, we can't wait for you to come spend the final week of summer holidays with us at the Burrow. We know you'll have lots to tell us about your vacation, and although Ron knows nothing about the Muggle world, between you and I, I'm sure we can communicate enough to him.

Can't wait to see you,

Harry and Ron

Hermione couldn't help but smile at the letter. _So they haven't forgotten about me_. Of course they hadn't. They were her best friends after all. Noticing that Hedwig, Harry's owl, was still there she quickly sprawled a note to them.

Harry and Ron,

My summer's been great! I'll tell you all about it as soon as I arrive. What I really want to know is what sort of mischief you two have been up to, hmm… Everyone knows that you two together equals nothing but trouble! Also, please tell Ginny that I've said hi. I can't wait to see her, because I know both of want to hear nothing of my incessant girl-talk ramblings. Well, I'll be seeing you, tomorrow. I do think it's quite odd that of all times to write me a letter and tell me you can't wait, it would be the day before I'm to arrive. Well, see you tomorrow. I love you both, and Ginny too.

Hermione

Hermione's thought of the days previous to her arrival at the Burrow were interrupted by a loud banging on the door.

"'Mione? You up?" That was most definitely Ron.

"Well if she wasn't up before, she probably is now" and that was Harry.

"Oh, right. 'Mione," he whispered.

"No need to whisper Ron, I'm up." Hermione said, opening the door. She used to hate that they gave her that ridiculous nickname, but she gave up fighting it during fourth year. There was no use anyway, Harry and Ron were an unstoppable force of annoying sometimes. Annoying, yet she loved them. They were like the brothers she'd never had, they'd always been there.

The past few days had been nothing but storytelling of the summer holidays and excitement for the return to school. Hermione couldn't exactly tell them _everything_ that had happened throughout the holiday, because some things you just can't tell people without them looking at you differently_…_

_The park was empty, as were all muggle parks around midnight. Hermione should have been home hours ago, but she was just too engulfed in the gorgeous man sitting in the grass beside her. It had been nothing serious, just a little kissing and hugging, maybe a little hand holding, but that's it. _

"_I have something I want to tell you, Hermione" Demitri said absently as he stared up at the stars, gazing at the universe, but paying attention to nothing in particular. After what seemed like hours, he still hadn't said anything else. Hermione lightly placed her hand on his. _

"_What is it?" _

"_I…I'm in love with you, Hermione" he whispered softly. He looked ashamed, almost. Like he had known he wasn't allowed to love her, but he did anyway. _

"_Dimitri, I…I can't. You can't love me, and I can't love you. This was supposed to just be a short, fun, summer thing." _

"_Baby, I know. But I'm not sorry. Everything about you, I just want to," he ran his hand up her arm as he stared into her eyes, leaned in and kissed her._

_Hermione hadn't been expecting this. She had known tonight would be their last night together, and she didn't want it to be awkward, but she didn't even imagine that this would happen. So, she did the only logical thing her mind could think of at the moment, she kissed him back. _

_It was a deep passionate kiss, one unlike any she had ever shared with him, with anyone. She was completely engulfed in it, she didn't want it to stop, but she knew it needed to. As the minutes passed, their kissing got more passionate, more personal. Dimitri's hand had traveled to the hem of her shirt, lifting it slowly and softly, getting it completely off of her in long minutes, careful not to truly break the flow of their passion. His hands moved to her back, where his fingers played against the clasp of her bra. Only then did she truly realize what was happening. _

"_Dimitri stop." She said between their kisses. She didn't believe she wanted him to, but she knew that if she continued with him this way, she might not have another chance to stop him. "Stop" she repeated. _

"_Baby, please. I love you." He whispered into her ear. The heat of his breath on her skin intoxicated her, and she let him continue, not quiet acknowledging that he was continuing, but also not feeling the need to stop him. _

_As she was pulled further and further into the ecstasy that was Dimitri, he was undoing her summer shorts and pulling them down her long, perfect legs. Before she knew it her knickers were also off and he was ready to be one with her. _

"_Please, stop." Hermione almost begged, regaining her senses. "We can't do this" she tried to push him off of her, but it was no use. He was too big, too built. What had she gotten herself into? _

"_Listen, Hermione. This is how I feel about you. I love you. You know you feel the same about me, you want to love me. We may not see each other after this, and I don't want to leave you with nothing. I love you." And with that he took her, in deed leaving her with nothing but the memory of how she was taken implanted into her mind for the rest of her life. _

_XXX _

_She had woken up cold, alone, and naked. Her clothes were strewn around her, her hair was a mess, and she was dirty. As she went to gather her clothes, she found a note from Dimitri. _

_Hermione, _

_Last night was amazing. I loved it, I loved you, but we can't be together anymore. I hope I left you with something you'll always remember, because I'm gone. _

_Dimitri _

_He did leave her with something. Something she would never forget. She was no longer Hermione Granger, the brightest witch of her day. She was now Hermione Granger, incredibly stupid, used, and disposable. She couldn't tell anyone, ever. But everyone had secrets right? _

XXX

Platform 9 ¾. For the past six years, this is where it all started. Right here, on Platform 9 ¾. Harry, Ron, and Hermione, along with Ron's little sister Ginny, said their goodbyes to Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, just as all the other students were, before boarding the train and searching for a compartment. Ginny headed off to be with her other friends, Merlin knows she wouldn't want to spend the entire ride with Ron, although she might have wanted to spend it with Harry.

"'Mione, don't the Head Girl and Boy have their own compartment?" Harry asked as they settled into one of the only empty compartments in the back of the train. She had forgotten all about that compartment. Not only that, but she'd also forgotten her curiosity about who the Head Boy could be. There we so many smart, accomplished blokes in the school.

Hermione picked up her little bag, with nothing other than books and her wand in them, and started to leave the compartment.

"We can come with you" Ron pitched in as she closed the door.

She simply nodded her head and began down the hall. Walking towards the front of the train, she couldn't help but attempt to narrow down the list of possible head boys. Of course in narrowing down that list, she'd completely overlooked one person.

XXXXXXXXX

He watched quietly as the students passed by his compartment, completely unaware that he was in there. _This could be a good thing_, he thought to him self, _as long as SOMEBODY doesn't come looking for me. _Being Head Boy did have its perks, even more perks than he could think of he would later find out. He didn't even have to guess who Head Girl would be; everyone in Hogwarts knew who it was. _Hermione Granger…the mudblood. _

As if his thoughts had the power to summon, she opened the door of the Head's compartment and stepped in.

"M-Malfoy?" Hermione stammered as her eyes rested on him and realization dawned in her eyes. "You're Head Boy?"

"No, Mudblood. I'm just in here to annoy the living hell out of you," he replied with a smirk. No use in her asking stupid questions. "Of course I'm Head Boy"

Hermione apparently had nothing to say, which was a first considering she always had something to say about everything. She just took her seat on the other side of the compartment and looked out the window.

XXX

Hours later the compartment was dead silent, except for the sounds of the train rattling quickly on the tracks. Granger had buried her nose in a book and all Draco could do was stare out the window and think. There was so much going on in his mind. He was glad to be at school, finally getting away from the manor, finally….

XXX

As the scenery flashed before his eyes, his mind couldn't help but wander to last nights squabble with his father…

"_Draco! You look at me when I address you, now son!" Lucius Malfoy was scolding his insolent son yet again. "Draco!" _

_Draco look up, staring at, staring past his father. "Yes, father" _

"_Are you ready to start preparing for your ceremony Draco?" _

"_I don't want to do the ceremony." Draco knew defying his father would have serious consequences, but then again, listening to his father _would_ too. There was no way to escape anything that would happen. _

"_What did you just say?" _

"_I said I don't WANT to do the ceremony." _

"_But you can't be inducted without the ceremony, Draco, you know that." Lucius didn't quite understand what Draco was trying to relay to him. _

"_Exactly father. I don't want to be inducted. I don't want to be a death eater. I don't want any of it. I just don't want to." _

"_What do you mean you don't WANT to? You don't have a choice Draco. You cannot be a Malfoy without completely following the Dark Lord. He is why you are here." Lucius was beyond pissed now. "You will do what's planned for you, and that's final" _

"_What if I don't father? I never wanted this. This is what YOU set for me!" Draco was fighting back with all the mental strength he had. _

"_Yes Draco, I'm glad you've finally gotten something right tonight. I did set this for you, and you're not being very grateful of what I put into this." _

"_Because I don't want this! For once in my life, could you please just let me choose my life?" _

"_Draco, If you haven't already figured this out, then you are much stupider than everyone thinks. YOUR LIFE HAS BEEN CHOSEN FOR YOU! Every aspect of it, already planned out. All you have to do is live it." Draco could tell that Lucius was annoyed with him. When wasn't his father annoyed with him?_

"_But father, if its all planned out for me than its not living. And I refuse to go on like that." Draco tried to plead with him. _

"_You refuse?" Lucius' large, strong hand went across Draco's face, leaving a stinging handprint "you can't refuse. And if you don't consider it living, that's fine. You don't have to live, you just have to be alive and obey orders. The Dark Lord will not be let down by me, so He will not be let down by you. Do you understand me son?" Lucius looked deadly, threatening, so much so that Draco was having second thoughts about trying to stand up for himself. _

"_Yes, father" he replied slowly, almost afraid to be hit again. He didn't like it when his father was angry. Who really would? He didn't want to be hit for trying to live, to be normal. But normal wasn't permitted, whatever normal was in the wizarding world. _

_He crawled up the stares to his room, going slow, remembering all the squabbles that happened down these hallways, how many stinging slaps he'd received, how many times he'd been pushed shown whose boss in this house. _

_He walked into his room, past the invisible memories, past every thing he has every felt, and entered his bathroom. One wall of his royal bathroom was made entirely of mirror, and there he stood, looking at his reflection. Who he saw in the mirror was the Draco that everyone else saw, the Draco that hid under the concelare spell, the concealment spell. _

_Draco touched the tip of his wand to his head, " revelare", and all the marks of his past, every fight with his father, every feeble attempt to make his own path, was revealed on his skin. The stories of his father's quick temper were there, the times he'd tried to hide from his destiny were there. It was all there, all showing and all free. No one knew this Draco, and no one ever would, because this was the his Draco, the Draco no one needed to know of. This was…._

"Malfoy!"

His thoughts were interrupted by someone calling his name. "Malfoy, earth to Draco Malfoy." He felt a shove on his side and was brought back to reality. It was the mudblood. What could she possibly want? There was no rule that they necessarily had to speak to each other, being Head Boy and Girl.

She stood there, staring at him. He was blankly aware of what was happening, bus still lost in his train of thought. Hermione placed a hand on his shoulder, trying to do something to bring him down from his thought-filled high. "Don't touch me, you filthy mudblood." He barked back instantly.

"Fine, ferret." She almost shouted back. She picked up her bag and turned to walk out the compartment door. "Next time I'll just leave you here and let the train leave with you still on it." She said over her shoulder. "And I know you wouldn't appreciate that. We have Head's duties Malfoy, so pull the stick out of your arse and come on."

"Don't talk to me that way, mudblood." He replied, but it was no use, because she was already gone, out of the compartment, off of the train.


	2. Thoughts and Dreams

A/N: 'ello everyone. Thanks for reviewing chapter one. And .star you are completely right. I probably could've made Lucius a little more violent. Thanks for the awesome suggestion. :D and now…Chapter 2.

DISCLAIMER: yeah, I'm not JKR, so the characters aren't mine, they're hers :D

* * *

Draco lay on his bed, thinking about the day he'd just had. The sorting/feast was normal, with McGonagall giving an unusually short speech. The food was great, as usual; the Slytherins adored him, as usual; everything was pretty much usual, except the head girl…

_McGonagall had just shown the head boy and head girl, Draco and Hermione, to their dorm. I was a spectacular room, the lighting was set perfectly and the fire was already ablaze. The room was decorated in natural colors, not too much red, not too much green, mostly silver, gold, black, and white. There were two sets of spiral staircases on either side of the back wall, which presumably led to the bedrooms, and in between them was the bathroom. Draco had noticed that there was a heavy silence hanging between them, but that was soon to be broken by Hermione. _

"_This dorm is amazing," she mumbled, the slightest hint of excitement in her voice. _

"_Calm down, mudblood," he replied coolly._

_Hermione ignored him and gave herself a tour of the dormitory, he shut up and followed, and the two didn't talk anymore. He noticed things about her, things that usually would have never passed through his mind. He saw the way she walked with her head down, a major change from her usual nose-in-the-air presence. He'd been expecting her to be beaming at the dorm, which was – of course, amazing, but she wasn't. She just looked at things, took them in, and moved on. _

_Eventually they went their separate ways, up their separate staircases, to their separate rooms. Draco's room was just the way he liked it, almost like a cave. The windows were covered with heavy black curtains, so during the day the light would only come in if he permitted it to. The walls were black and silver, with snakes on the trim. In the middle of the room stood a grand, king sized four poster donned with velvet black and silver sheets and blankets. _

_To be honest, Draco loved his room. It was purely his, at least for this year, and he wouldn't be sharing with those snoring gits in the Slytherin boy's dorm. Now, lying on his bed, he thought on a problem at hand…Hermione MUDBLOOD Granger. He had to work with the girl, so he should at least be civil towards her. Sure, she was an annoying know-it-all, but she was still a person, right? Boy – what father would say if he heard that last thought, he'd be beating Draco into next month…_

Draco rolled onto his side and propped himself up on his elbow. He finally decided to go talk to little miss muggle, erm – Hermione. He rolled off of his bed 'I'll miss you bed' he thought, and then giggled at the thought of him missing a bed. He walked out of his room and down his staircase. The fire in the common room had gone out; apparently there was no need for it as both Heads were in their respective rooms. He continued on, past the bathroom, to Hermione's staircase.

"Granger," He shouted up the stairs. He waited for a moment, but there was no response, so he ascended the staircase. Coming to the door, he stopped…' I bet her room is all girly', he thought before knocking. She still wasn't answering, and he was getting kind of worried, although he would never admit it. He checked the doorknob, sure enough, the door was open. He let himself in.

The room was the exact opposite of what he'd expected. In fact, it was more like his room than anything. The walls were a grayish-black, the curtains were black with blood red patterns, gold trimmed the room, and her four-poster had black and gold sheets. The lights in the room were dim, so it wasn't exactly like his room, which was only illuminated by a lamp in the corner.

Hermione sat in one corner of the room, sunken into a bean bag. She was scribbling furiously into a notebook. He could only imagine what she was writing about, but why put effort into something he didn't really care about? Music could be heard from her headphones and it definitely wasn't the cute pop one would think she'd listen to. Heavy metal rang through the area around her. 'I swear if that gets any louder she'll be deaf'.

Draco stood there for a moment, just watching her. She had changed over the summer. She'd gotten pale, her hair was black, and no longer was it wild and unruly, but straight. She also looked thinner, much thinner, but not totally curve less. He kept watching her. She still had yet to notice him, and until she did, he would stand here. Finally, she did look up, and sure enough, she saw him. She pulled the blasting headphone out of her ear.

"Ugh…Malfoy, I don't know if you're lost or not, but this is my room. What are you doing in it?" Viciousness was not lost from that statement. Draco could clearly tell that she was annoyed. Oh well, she'd get over it.

"Look mud cake, I don't like this anymore than you do, but we have to work and live together, so we should at least be civilized towards each other."

"…and you expect to accomplish this by calling me mud cake?" the venom in her voice could almost kill, almost.

"Fine, no name calling, I'll just stick to calling you Granger then."

"Yes, because Hermione is just too hard a name to say…"

"No, because we are not on a first name basis"

"Oh whatever"

"Goodbye _HERMIONE" _he'd placed enough stress on her name that she got aggravated and all but pushed him out of the room.

As Draco went back to his own room, he couldn't help but think that there was something wrong with her…and he wanted to find out what it was.

~.~.~.~.DMHG.~.~.~.~

Hermione lay down in her bed, staring at the ceiling. The Malferret had just left, so all was peaceful in her room again. When she first got in here, she'd hated it. The walls were too white, the lights too bright. She'd changed that quickly though. Now everything was perfect. She rolled over and picked up her diary, flipping to an entry that she hadn't finished, as her thoughts were interrupted by that stupid excuse for a head boy.

_Diary, _

_I hate writing in you. I really do. But Dr. Reuben said you're good for me, even though that was two years ago. I don't know why I still write in here. I guess it's just nice to see how I've changed over time, or really, how I haven't changed at all. I'm back at school now. I'm head girl, not that that's surprising. The surprising thing is that MALFOY of all people is head boy. Well, I guess it's not too much of surprise but still…I have to share a dorm with that wanker. He's gotten, well I won't lie – hot. Very, very hot. I mean, he's always had this cute spoiled boy thing going on, but now he's just hot. Moving on, I want this year to not suck. Sure, school hasn't ever really suck sucked, but it could be better. Sometimes I wish Harry and Ron would acknowledge me more than just when they need help with their homework. Ever since fourth year, they've decided to distance themselves from me, but not too much. They're still my best friends – shows what kind of life I live huh? I think I actually have to put forth the effort to have a better year this year, ever since the summer I've _

…this is where Malfoy came in, ruining her train of thought. She would leave the entry unfinished, there was no point in trying to do it now. Hermione laid back down and though about summer.

_It was the beginning of summer and Hermione was just getting used to being back in the muggle world. She didn't know what to do with herself, so she thought she'd go to the mall to get some clothes for the summer. Little did she know that her muggle ex-boyfriend would be there. _

"_Hermione?" Jacob stood above the girl he once knew so well. _

"_Jake…it's so good to see you again," Hermione said, sarcasm weaved in her voice. She really didn't want to see him anymore. After what he'd done to her…_

"_Well, Hermione, I hope you've been holding up well…oh this is Georgia, my girlfriend." A tall model like blonde came up to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down a little to kiss him. He returned his attention to Hermione. "Are you seeing anyone Hermione?" _

"_No," she answered simply. _

"_Oh," she said, and then she thought she heard him mumble something like "figures…" _

"_Yeah, um, I've got to go" she said quickly. She turned around, picked up her bag, and walked out the door. If she wanted clothes today, she certainly was not about to get them. Not with that idiot running around with his bimbo. _

_Hermione walked into her house and went upstairs to her bathroom. She examined herself in the mirror, trying to figure out what he meant by 'figures…'. As far as she could see, there was nothing wrong. She was just…Hermione. Sure her hair was a bit wild, but she could always tame that. Finding nothing considerably wrong, she slipped on her shoes and walked back out the door. _

_She made her way towards the park, trying to think of something that would make it obvious that she wouldn't have a boyfriend. Not that she needed one, but that was beside the point. She sat on the swing, her mind full of questions that need answers. _

"_What's wrong with me?" this she asked aloud. _

"_Absolutely nothing my dear," a voice came from behind her. _

_Hermione turned around to see who said that. Behind her was a man so gorgeous that he must have been an apparition. _

_Their relationship started there and quickly escalated. Dimitri – that was his name – treated her like she was the most important person to ever walk the earth. Sure, it was a bit wrong, with him being 25 and her being 17, but he seemed like he knew what she needed. He was more mature than any guy she'd ever even sorta been with. _

_Everything about the summer was amazing, up until a month before break ended. That was when the incident happened. She had just told him that she was going to school, even though it was a month early, because she was going to the burrow to spend time with Ron and Harry. He decided that since she was leaving, they should spend the last day together. It was that night that he raped her. _

At this thought, Hermione almost cried. That was her falling moment and she really didn't like reliving it. She remembered how much she hurt that day.

_She had woken up cold, alone, and naked. Her clothes were strewn around her, her hair was a mess, and she was dirty. As she went to gather her clothes, she found a note from Dimitri. _

_Hermione, _

_Last night was amazing. I loved it, I loved you, but we can't be together anymore. I hope I left you with something you'll always remember, because I'm gone. _

_Dimitri _

_Tears proceeded to fall from her eyes. How could he do this to her? All those days he told her he loved her; the way he made her feel…she thought it was all real. Never did she think that she'd be used, raped, and abandoned. As her tears continued to fall, Hermione got dressed. She didn't really want to go home, but she had no where to go. _

_She entered her front door quietly, so as to not wake her parents. After showering, she stumbled to her bed, too tired to really do anything else, but instead of sleeping, she ran through every thought in her mind. 'I was raped' she thought, 'I was used. He never really loved me. I'm so stupid'. _

_He final thought…'Jake was right, something is wrong with me.' _

That was the last day of the Hermione everyone knew. She became more recluse than ever before, spending days all by herself. She put off her trip to the burrow by two months – 'Harry and Ron can wait, I'm not ready to see anyone right now.' This was true – she hadn't left the house since she stumbled in, she had barely seen her parents, who were worried sick about her, but too busy to really notice anything wrong.

She spent those two weeks changing herself. They were minor changes, like dying her hair black and putting a permanent straightening spell on it, changing her wardrobe to the darkest colors in the spectrum, and don't forget about a bad habit she'd picked up on.

_After spending two days in her bed crying, Hermione finally got up. True, she didn't want to, but she needed to. She walked over to her bathroom, turned on the water, and washed her face. Then, she looked at herself. Her hair straight and black, she no longer looked like herself. She got a headache, so she wanted to get some aspirin. She opened the medicine cabinet just above the sink and found some aspirin, took it, and went to put it back. When closing the medicine cabinet, something caught her eye. Small and shiny, a razor blade was there waiting for her to discover. _

_She picked it up, wondering whether or not to do it. She'd seen in on muggle television, distressed teens taking out their emotions on themselves. 'It can't hurt that bad if it happens over and over again' she thought to herself. Without another thought, she lifted the blade to her wrist and cut, blood spilling immediately and dropping to the floor. _

That was only the beginning of what turned into a major problem. Every time something bad happened, every time she was angry or had bad thoughts, she cut. It became a small addiction to her, and after a while she stopped feeling the pain. Her arm was covered in cuts, most of which she hid with a concealment charm. The only ones she left to be hidden the muggle way were the ones on her wrist. To her, it was a constant reminder. She hid those behind wristbands, not wanting anyone else to see them, but not wanting to vanish them.

Now, in her warm bed in Hogwarts, Hermione was drifting off to sleep. Usually, around this time she would be bawling her eyes out, but too many tears had fallen over this. She needed to get over it and move on. She thought about school, and what tomorrow and the rest of the school year would bring.

For the first time in a long time, Hermione went to sleep without crying.

* * *

**A/N: **Ok so i just thought this deserved a note, but the part when draco is on his bed and he giggles, when i wronte it i was like HAHAHA DRACO, GIGGLEING, right!! ok so i know he wouldn't really giggle but yeah giggling draco.


	3. I Swear, I'll Figure You Out

**A.N:**Okay so i'm trying seriously hard to get as much of this written as i can so i can get it up and posted. I know its mostly been a Hermione engaged story for the past two chapters, but i swear, we'll delve into Draco's problems too. So without further ado...  
Disclaimer: These characters that i love to write about are not the creation of my own mind, they belong solely to JKR.

* * *

She awoke with a start. It was the first day of classes at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and it would not suck for head girl, Hermione Granger – at least, that's what she kept telling herself. She didn't have to focus on anything except school, although that might not happen.

She began to get dressed in her school uniform. This year, she went out of her way to make it the most individual uniform. She started with a black cami and she plaid school skirt. She chose a vest over the cami instead of her blazer jacket. Instead of knee high socks, she wore leggings. Instead of trainers she wore flats. Her last accessory was a constant for her – her wristband. She had dozens of wristbands in her collection, enough to go almost two months without repeating. Next she took care of her hair. Black and straight, contrasting against her pale skin, it was near perfect already. She added some clips to it and gave it a little volume so that it wasn't absolutely flat. She grabbed her bag and walked out her door, descended the stairs and stopped in the common room.

Her original plan was to wait for Malfoy, but she decided against it; she wanted today to not suck and she was sure that even though he was the one to propose that they be "civil" toward each other, he would find some way to offend her. As she walked down the corridors, she got a couple of stares and glances, which she was pretty much used to so she ignored. 'Today is not going to suck' she thought to herself.

Coming upon the Great Hall, she straightened out. She put on a smile and walked in. As she made her way towards the Gryffindor table, half of the students stopped their chatter and stared at her. What were they thinking…she was still the same Hermione right? She looked over to the Slytherin table and saw that Malfoy was already there. Good thing she'd decided not to wait for him. She took her seat between Harry and Ron, who were talking about quidditch.

"Hey 'Mione," Ron said, his mouth stuffed.

"Eww… Ron, don't talk with food in your mouth, its gross" Hermione said. Ron grunted in response.

"'Mione, you look so…different," Harry told her.

"What do you mean different?" She asked him.

"Just, you know…different" Harry was straining not to be too rude about his opinion.

"Harry James Potter, are you saying that you don't approve of the way I choose to dress?" Hermione was genuinely offended.

"No 'Mione, I was just saying, not that I don't approve, I actually quite like it." Harry looked sorry, but his comment seriously hurt Hermione.

"Then what are you saying?"

"Nothing, 'Mione. Just drop it. Forget I said anything."

"No, Harry…I can't believe you'd say such a thing." She started sniffling. His comment hit her to the core.

"What? All I said was that you look different." He was genuinely confused.

"You know what Harry, I don't need this."

"'Mione…please…"

"I have some Head's duties to take care of before class, so I'll be going now" She said, turning on her heel to leave. 'Some best friends they are. They couldn't even act like they cared for me'. Passing curious glances and questioning looks, she walked out the door.

'So much for today won't suck' she thought to herself. She couldn't believe what just happened. Harry Potter single handedly ruined her day. As she walked along the corridor towards the potions classrooms, her thoughts swirled around head. How could they call themselves her best friends when it was obvious that they could care less?

Hermione sat in a corner near the potions room and fell into her thoughts. This day couldn't possibly get any worse, and it wasn't even lunch yet. She saw a shadow approaching and something in her mind knew who it was, but she prayed that it wasn't. Sure enough, king ferret face himself rounded the corner.

"Hey Granger" he said in a nonchalant way.

"Uh…, Malfoy, what are you doing back here?" For once since they'd arrived at the school, her voice wasn't laced with annoyance.

"Oh, you know, same old thing. Waiting for class, walking down halls, stalking you…" his voiced trailed off.

"Why?"

"Hmm..."

"Why are you stalking me?"

"…Just trying to get you alone in a corner…" he smirked at her.

"And what would you be planning to do with me alone, in a corner?"

"Have a bit of fun. I'm sure you'll enjoy it when I rape you."

The look on his face was on of pure hilarity, one could tell he was joking, but for Hermione, this was all too serious. The color in her face drained, she got quiet and still. She tried to force every thought in her mind away, but it was too late, the tears had already begun welling up in her eyes.

"Calm down Granger, I was joking"

Hermione was already on her feet. She grabbed her bag and briskly walked down the hall towards the bathroom. She had to get away from him. Reason told her that there was no way he could possibly know, but her emotions told her otherwise. Those wicked emotions of hers told her that he was going to hurt her. Finally she made it to the restroom, rushed into a stall, and cried.

~.~.~.~.DMHG.~.~.~.~

The bell rang for potions to begin and Granger was nowhere to be seen. Being the not-a-total-arsehole that he was, he felt a bit guilty. 'I don't know what I said to make her cry like that, but something is definitely not right about her.'

"Mr. Malfoy," a voice interrupted his thoughts. "Can you please tell us where our _beloved_ head girl is?" Professor Severus Snape asked. If voices were animagus, his would be a snake, right up there with old moldy Voldy.

"Yes, professor…She's taking care an argument right now, two first year, you know?" Draco was glad that his that his adept lying skills were on full force today.

"Then why, pray tell, are you not assisting her?" Damn Snape and his prodding questions.

"Well, professor, I was helping her, but she said she could handle it and that one should be here to tell you."

"Very well," he turned back to the board "You're in charge of making sure she gets what she need from today's lecture."

"Yes sir"

Class resumed as usual, sans Hermione. Snape droned on and on about how we were a lucky bunch to be able to take such advanced potions course and blah blah blah. Draco was just on the verge of nodding off when the door in the back of the classroom had opened and in walked Hermione, looking as normal as ever.

"I'm sorry I'm late professor, I was just, uh, handling a thing." She stuttered through her sentence.

"Yes, yes Miss Granger. Mr. Malfoy here has already informed us of your whereabouts. Now take a seat." Snape was clearly annoyed.

Draco noticed that there was only one empty seat in the classroom, and it happened to be next to him. He also noticed that Hermione was looking all over the place for another seat. Finally she gave up and sat next to him. Minutes later, Draco was confronted by a small piece of paper being passed to him.

**What'd you tell him?** Hermione had written on the piece of paper.

**Nothing, just that you were handling an argument. **He wrote back to her.

**Oh, okay. Thanks, I owe you one. **

**I'll hold you to that. ** He responded to her, she nodded in response, and with that they both paid attention to the boring lecture that seemed to never end.

When class finally did end Draco intended to talk to Hermione about what happened in the hall way – he wanted to find out what made her cry like that – when his best friend, or rather his longest lasting friend, Blaise Zabini confronted him.

"Hey, Drake," Blaise greeted.

"Hey. What's up?"

"Nothing. Can't I just talk to my best friend whom I haven't seen since the end of last year?"

"Why certainly, Mr. Zabini."

Blaise wasted no time with the friendly formalities of a new school year. It was known that he was one of the biggest starters of gossip in Hogwarts, right below those two chatty Gryffindors.

"So tell me, Mr. Head Boy, what happened this morning with our _beloved _head girl?" he asked, mocking what Snape had said earlier.

"What are you talking about?" as soon as the words left his mouth, he realized what Blaise was referring to.

"You know, this morning, hallway, before potions, running away crying…" the list went before Draco finally stopped him.

"Oh that."

"Yeah that."

"Well, I don't exactly know what happened. I said something and she started crying. I was actually going to talk to her about that right now, but I guess I'll have to wait."

"And why would you being talking to her about it? Could it be that you actually care about hurting her feelings?" Yep, this was that start of a new rumor.

"Well, I don't exactly care about hurting her, but I do care about not pissing her off too much. I do have to live with her and it would be hell to be in there while she's pissed at me." These words were true, but not completely. Of course, Blaise could see that.

"Drake, don't lie. You do care."

"Fine, I care a bit, but not for the reasons you think."

"Then what reason would you have for caring about the mudbucket?"

"Well, I want to find out what's bothering her, and then use it against her."

"For what, Drake? Stop being so damn vague."

Here is where the lie came in. "Its for a, uh…., task."

"Oh, okay. I'll keep it hushed." Displeased with the fact that he had no gossip to spread around, he walked away.

Draco left the classroom to continue his day in boredom.

~.~.~.~.DMHG.~.~.~.~

Hermione sat in her floppy beanbag, diary in her lap, closed her eyes, and thought a while. It was unfair how cruel life was sometimes. Today was supposed to be an amazing day, but it sucked all thanks to Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy. It was strange how Malfoy knew about her problem, while Harry and Ron didn't even know anything was wrong. Sure she looked different, but that didn't mean anything. She opened her diary to a new page, picked up a quill, and began to write.

_Diary, _

_Today sucked. Seriously …Harry killed my day. How is it possible for him and Ron to be my best friends when they know practically nothing about me? Today Harry noticed that I "look different". Well, of course I do. I didn't change my hair for nothing. Maybe the worst part of the day was with Malfoy though…I think he knows. But he did something completely non-Malfoyish today. He covered for me with Snape. I was afraid I would get detention on the first day of classes, not that I care but it would be a bad example because I'm head girl and I'm not supposed to do things like that. Of course, nothing is free in the land of Malfoy, so he said I owe him one which should be easy enough I guess.  
I'm going to go to be now. Goodbye diary. _

She closed her diary and set it down on the floor, then sank back into the beanbag. She was in the process of sorting through her thoughts when she heard a cough from the doorway. Yet again, Malfoy had let himself in her room.

"I don't know if you have some sort of addiction to this room, but you need to break it, like now," she said to him smugly. She really wasn't in the mood to deal with him and his arrogant ways.

"Oh, calm down, Granger." He said back.

"AUGH! What do you want Mr. Malicious Malferret?"

"I thought we agreed on no name calling."

"Fine, Malfoy, what do you want?"

"Aw… is Draco too hard for wittle bitty Hermione to pronounce?" This conversation was going nowhere, and Hermione was getting annoyed quickly.

"Fine…Draco, what is it that you so obviously want, because you won't go away."

"Relax, Granger. Remember when I said you owe me one?"

"Mhmm…"

"That's al I'm here for."

"Fine...what is it?"

"I need you to tell me something." This shocked Hermione. She'd definitely been ready to give something up.

"…Okay?"

"I need you to tell me, why are you so weird?" This question was asked with all seriousness. Draco didn't even smirk when he asked it.

"Excuse me?"

"You're, you know, acting weird."

"What are you talking about?"

"You've changed and now you're all weird. You're not as cheery as before, you've stopped following the pothead and his weasel; you don't even really look the same. Honestly, if I hadn't known it was you, I would have mistaken you for a slytherin." This came as a shock to her. Sure she'd gotten a bit pale, and that permanent straightening spell was of good use after she died her hair black, but to say she looked like a slytherin type person was pushing it.

"Um…Okay?"

"Well, I just want to know why?"

"You want to know why I'm weird." This conversation was getting stranger and stranger with each word.

"Yes…I want to know why you are weird. Why the changes?"

"Things happen and things change, you've just got to learn to deal with it." She said. With that she closed her eyes, leaned her head back, and went into thinking mode.

Draco made to leave and was almost out the door when he turned and said, "I'll figure out what you're hiding, Hermione. And when I do, you and I are going to have a long talk about it." He laughed his maniacal Malfoy laugh and went on his way, closing the door behind him.

~.~.~.~.DMHG.~.~.~.~

As Draco walked to his bedroom, thoughts of Hermione ran through his head. Every time he saw her, he noticed something new and different about her. Today, it was her wristband. He noticed that she had a whole bunch of them, but they were only worn on that one wrist. 'Maybe it's a new muggle trend,' he told himself. It couldn't be much to worry about, it was, after all, just a wristband. '

Passing through the common room, he decided to sit and enjoy the fire for a while before heading to bed. His mind full of questions, he quickly got lost in the flickering flame. It wasn't until those flames turned green that he woke out of his daze. Staring back at him was the face of Lucius Malfoy.

* * *

A.N**:** See what i mean, we're getting into Draco's problems too. On to the next chapter....


	4. First Glimpse of Father

**A.N: **So i know this story is kinda dry and it also kinda sucks but i'm doing the best that i can do. I'm also getting it out as quick as possible so you're not like WTF is this crap that makes no sense because if you're like me, you don't like unfinished work. So here's chapter four, complete with drama :D  
**DISCLAIMER:** JKR's characters, settings, etc.; not mine.

* * *

Previously:

Passing through the common room, he decided to sit and enjoy the fire for a while before heading to bed. His mind full of questions, he quickly got lost in the flickering flame. It wasn't until those flames turned green that he woke out of his daze. Staring back at him was the face of Lucius Malfoy.

"Hello, son," Lucius greeted in his light yet demanding voice. Remember that list from before? Lucius was on the list right under Snape.

"Father," was Draco's response. It was obvious to him that his father was here on urgent business; otherwise he wouldn't have risked being seen by Granger.

"I assume you've done as I told you."

"Yes, Father."

"And have you decided yet?"

"Yes, sir."

"The decision, boy. What is your decision?"

"My decision stands as it previously did. I will not join the dark lord." He knew what would be coming soon. He knew that soon, he would be cringing in pain at the hands of his father. Every time he defied his father, he knew of the pain that would follow. But he also knew that he couldn't give in, he couldn't join his father in the ranks of death eaters, and he couldn't be Voldemort's heir – or more, he didn't want to.

"Very well boy, we have some discussing to do. Be in the dungeons in two hours." Lucius didn't wait for Draco's response, the flames in the fireplace immediately reverted to their original color and then extinguished.

As insubordinate as Draco was, he wasn't stupid. He would be in the dungeons in two hours to get his punishment, then he would come back up to his room battered and bruised, try to sneak past Hermione so as to not get questioned, hide his pain, and go to sleep.

He thought about walking up into his room, but he decided against it. Instead, he went to the bathroom. Stepping in front of the mirror, he pulled out his wand and revealed his scars. Instantly, his true skin was shown, marred by bruises and cuts. He remembered the story behind each and every one of them, but remembering hurt. He reconcealed his scars and went back out the common room; he would take a walk to prepare himself for a new set of scars and a new story to remember.

Walking out of the common room, he wondered if he should tell Hermione where he was going, in case she needed him for something, but then he thought of how preposterous that sounded; why would she need him, when she's been avoiding him since they got to the school.

He began his walk through the corridors. He knew it was past curfew, but that didn't really matter to him. The silence was deadly; if a pin dropped three floors down, he was sure he would hear it. He walked to a window overlooking the lake. That lake was the most peaceful part of the whole school – too close to the forbidden forest for scared souls to venture to, too unexciting for adventure seekers to stop at. If only he could go sit at the lake, maybe he could think straight.

It wasn't as if he was exactly scared of his father, because if he was he would have already caved in and joined. He was, however, apprehensive when around him. He thought back to the first time the Cruciatus curse was used on him…

_Twelve year old Draco sat in his room, reading a book. He didn't do much these days, just waiting for school to start. He could go outside, but what fun would that be when he'd already explored every inch of the manor's grounds. _

"_DRACO!!!" the voice of his father rang through the manor. Draco knew this meant he was angry, for when he wasn't completely infuriated, he just sent up a house elf. _

"_Coming, father," Draco said, dropping his book on the ground as he sprinted out the room. Running through the manor to Father was always a pain; it was the only setback to having such a large house. Finally making it to Lucius, he stood as straight and tall as he could. _

"_Have you been practicing, boy?" Lucius asked in his harshest tone._

"_Y-Yes, sir," Draco answered timidly. He knew he was lying, he didn't want to practice the evil ways of his father, especially on the house elves. _

"_Let's see then shall we," he turned. "Dobby!" he called. Instantly, the elf appeared and positioned himself a few feet away from Draco. "Alright boy, go ahead." _

_Draco stood stiff, scared. He knew he was about to once again displease his father and would therefore be punished for it. He raised his wand and pointed it at the helpless elf, whose eyes were wide with terror, as it too expected him to be able to perform at top efficiency. _

"_Crucio!!!" Draco yelled, wand still pointed at the elf. Dobby hunched over and winced, but did not make a sound. The spell was not strong enough, as Draco really had not been practicing and therefore failed. _

"_Well…" Lucius began. _

_Draco just stood there, staring at his father, preparing for another punishment._

"_What do you have to say for yourself?" _

"_I…I don't know. I practiced, I really did." Draco tried to get himself out of it in a vain attempt at lying. _

"_LIES!!" Bellowed Lucius. He then proceeded to knock his cane into Draco's back, toppling the boy over onto the floor. "You did not practice, did you, you insolent little boy?" _

"_Yes father, I did, I really did" Draco pleaded. _

"_STOP LYING TO ME!" Lucius stomped on his son's arm, the next sound heard was a crack. "Now, did you practice?" _

"_No, sir" Draco admitted, hoping this father would stop beating him. _

"_Very well… shall I demonstrate what your curse should have looked like?" _

_Draco desperately wanted to say no, but he was in so much pain he gave in, just this once. "Yes, sir." _

_Lucius lifted his wand, and pointed his wand at Draco, whose head was turned, eyes trained on Dobby. "Crucio!" In the next instance, Draco was writhing in pain, screaming bloody murder as his father stood over him and cackled his evil cackle. "Now do you see the power in practicing?" _

_Draco, of course, couldn't answer because of the pain he was subjected to. It ran through his body like electricity, shocking every part oh him. He now understood why this was an unforgivable curse. Once, he thought that people were exaggerating when they described the pain that the victim would be in, now he knew that they sugarcoated it. _

_The spell was lifted when Draco ceased all movement. The pain was too much; he stopped writhing and just lay there. Lucius put his wand back into his pocket and stepped over his unconscious son and walked out of the room, more satisfied with his own parenting skill than he was with his son's wizarding ability. _

_When Draco awoke, he was being tended to by Dobby. The little elf didn't say anything, he just tended to Draco's open wounds and left. Draco left soon after the elf was gone and went into the bathroom in his room to examine himself. The scars on his body were worse now than they were ever before. He didn't want to linger on them too long though, so he concealed them, crawled to his bed and went to sleep. _

Pulled back into reality, Draco realized that he had to go meet his father. He wasn't afraid, and he expected the worst, but he still went anyway, for he'd rather be beaten, bruised, and alive than dead. He walked down the silent corridors toward the dungeons, thinking about what he would say to his father. He kept walking until he got to his destination, went to the first empty classroom, and walked in to meet with his father, hoping to come out breathing.

~.~.~.~.DMHG.~.~.~.~

Hermione knew it was wrong to do what she was doing, but she continued to do it anyway. What she'd overheard changed a lot of her perceptions of a certain Slytherin, and now she was worried about him. Sure, it wasn't right to eavesdrop on his conversation with his father, but it's not like she did it on purpose. She'd just been going to the common room when she heard two voices, and she didn't want to intrude.

She continued to follow him, only stopping when he stopped. She noticed when he stared out to the lake. He was the only other person she had ever know to just sit at the lake; she'd seen him there one day last year when she wanted to be alone, away from Harry and Ron.

As he stared out, she wondered what he was thinking about so intently. As time passed, she fell asleep, bored from Draco's stillness. When she awoke, he was nowhere to be seen. She quickly straightened up and ran toward the dungeons.

As she got closer, she started to hear voices. She could instantly tell that they belonged to Draco and Lucius. She didn't know what was going on, but she continued to walk toward the classroom that the noise was coming from. She leaned on the door carefully, so as not to make a sound, and listened to the conversation.

"My son, please explain to me why you are refusing to join us." This was most definitely Lucius.

"I've already said, father, that I don't want to live the life you've set for me." Hermione had never heard Draco sound so intimidated. At this moment she knew that it was not a ruse, and that Draco – as much of a evil arsehole as he was – was not evil to the core. He wasn't even half as evil as she thought him to be.

She could hear footsteps now, so she looked around to see if someone was coming. No one was there, so they must have been coming from inside the room. She heard Lucius' voice again. "This is not acceptable, Draco."

"I know, father, but neither is what you do." The net sound heard was a great resounding slap. Hermione just about jumped out of her skin at the sound. She'd never known that Draco was hit by his father. She'd always thought they he was a spoiled brat. This day was opening so many windows which she'd mistaken as walls.

"Now, boy, do want to try that again?" Lucius sounded pissed beyond pissed. Hermione could hear the same snakelike tone she heard when Snape talked.

"No, sir"

"Now, as we discussed last time, you will join us and you will like it. I don't care if you don't consider living the life I've prepared for you an actual life, but you will live it. Is that understood, dear son?"

"No, sir" Hermione heard a faint "oof" and a crack. She knew that that meant something was broken. She was scared for him.

"When will you learn, son, that the only way to live is to join us? Otherwise, you will be seen as a traitor."

"I don't care, father, I don't want to join you." Hermione could hear him trying to get up. Then she heard Lucius yell.

"Crucio!" She heard Draco scream in pain. At that moment, she was glad that the door was closed. She wouldn't be able to take it if she saw him helplessly writhing. Even if she was a different person, she still couldn't watch someone be tortured, even if it was Draco.

The screaming continued, but Lucius talked over it. "You will join us, Draco, if it's the last thing you do. I will make sure that you know that there will be no insubordination in my family. You will continue to be the heir of the dark lord, for it's what you were born to do, and you will like it, or you will die."

There wasn't a reply from Draco, but Hermione did hear Lucius' footsteps. She quickly but quietly scurried to get around the corner and hide. She heard the door open, she heard the door close, and she heard retreating footsteps. She waited a good five minutes before going to the room and opening the door.

What she saw inside scared her to bits. A battered, bruised, and bloody Draco lay unconscious on the floor, in the corner. She rushed to him. He looked minutes away from dying. It was terrifying. She did every spell she knew to stop his bleeding. She could only do so much, but she did remember something. She had to wake him up just incase he hit his head so he wouldn't get a concussion.

"Draco" she whispered, gently poking him so that he would wake up. She didn't want to hurt him anymore. "Please get up, Draco." She wad frightened – she couldn't wake him. She didn't know what else to do, so she summoned a stretcher from the hospital wing. A few minutes later, it floated into the room.

She had a few problems getting him onto it, but she eventually did and she began rolling him out of the room. When she got to the first staircase, she had to stop and think. Draco wasn't that heavy, but she doubted that she could carry him up the stairs on this stretcher. Eventually she came up with the most logical idea. She cast a disillusionment charm on him and ran up to get Madam Pomfrey.

She banged on the door of the hospital wing. "Madam Pomfrey!" she yelled. When the door finally opened, the medi-witch in her nightgown came out.

"What is it, Miss Granger?"

"Please, Madam Pomfrey, you have to come quickly. Draco is seriously injured and I couldn't carry him up here." Hermione was frantic. Immediately, the medi-witch was off, running down the hallway as fast as she could (which was actually kind of slow). Hermione followed after her.

When they finally reached the Draco, Madam Pomfrey was confused. "Where is he Miss Granger?" Hermione retracted her disillusionment charm and Madam Pomfrey rushed to aid him. Hermione helped the medi-witch bring Draco up to the hospital wing, they set him on a bed, and Hermione was finally able to calm herself.

In the midst of hyperventilation, the medi-witch asked "What happened to him?" Hermione didn't know how to answer this question. 'What if Draco doesn't want anyone to know that his father does this to him?' she thought to herself. She would let him tell the truth or lie if he wanted, and she wouldn't stop him because it was his secret to tell. So she lied…

"I don't know – I was walking around looking for him because we were done patrolling and I found him like that." It was the best she could come up with, but she was content with it.

"Alright, Miss Granger, if you would please return to your room, I will take care of Mr. Malfoy."

Hermione got up and walked out of the hospital wing toward their dorm. She couldn't help but wonder where her compassion for Draco had come from. They weren't friends or anything; it would've been easier to just leave him there. But she couldn't. It would've hurt her to know that he died or got too seriously injured and she was right there.

Finally, she reached the portrait, said the password, and stepped in. She sat in the common room, and stared at the fire, getting lost in her thoughts. Why wasn't Draco joining the dark lord? Why was his father such a bastard? And was he as evil as she thought he was? Apparently not. As these questions rolled around in her head, she fell asleep, opening the doors to a nightmare replay of the nights occurrences.

* * *

**A.N: **So...what'd you think...leave me a review please. :D I'd love it if you did. Also....the DMHG is finally starting show. and i was able to work some Draco drama in because it was getting too Hermione centered. :D


	5. Accusations and Apologies

Hey there...getting this out quick, yes? ok well... here is chapter five.

**DISCLAIMER**: you know the drill, JKR owns.

* * *

Draco awoke to find himself in a white room, in a white bed, with white pillows and white sheets. He wondered what he was doing in such bland place, and then he remembered last night. Images of the incident with his father flashed through his head. He remembered his father breaking his leg, he remembered the pain of the Cruciatus curse, and he remembered that he did not give in.

He looked around and noticed that the hospital wing was almost completely empty except for him. He saw Madam Pomfrey in the corner fixing up a vial of something, presumably for him. After she finished what she was doing, she walked over to him and placed the vial on his bedside table.

"I see you're awake dear." Draco only nodded in response. "Drink up that vial, and you'll be fine, but you need to stay in here an extra day to rest." He nodded again, this time picking up the small vial and knocking it back, swallowing it in one gulp.

The medi-witch continued, "You looked pretty beat up last night. Something fatal might have happened if Miss Granger hadn't found you." Draco raised an eyebrow. So that's how he got here. He was wondering about that. 'So little miss book worm went looking for me…" Not soon after he thought that thought, the potion knocked him unconscious.

When he woke up again, he was surprised to see who was sitting next to him. It was Hermione, looking as worried as she might have looked if it was one of her friends laying there instead of him.

"What are you doing here?" he asked her. There was a nasty tone to his voice, but it wasn't there on purpose.

"I was just checking on you," she replied softly, almost with care. It was true, although they weren't the best of friends, they were no longer enemies. This was for two reasons: one, it's hard to work with your enemy, and two, enemies don't save each other from certain death.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because I was worried," she answered, completely honestly. It shocked him that she did push it off like it was nothing and say something like that she was worried that she'd have to go clean out his room when he died or something stupid like that, but then he remembered that she wasn't completely cold-hearted, even if she acted like it sometimes.

"No need to be, I'm fine." Draco said. He wasn't totally lying. He'd been through this before, he knew how felt, he would get through it fine.

"Draco…" she started. It was like she didn't know what to say to him. Then she found two words that summed up just about everything. "I know." This was said with all seriousness. Draco didn't know what she meant, the girl knew damn near everything anyway.

"What are you talking about?" He asked her, he wasn't sure what she knew, but he was going to find out.

"We'll talk when you can come back to the dorm." With that, Hermione got up and left.

Draco looked over to the medi-witch, who was preoccupying herself scribbling on some papers. "How long until I can leave?"

"You may leave after I talk with you about who did this."

Draco was now at a loss about what to do. He could simply tell her about his father, the beatings, the dark lord and everything that went along with it, or he could lie. He chose the latter.

"I honestly don't know Madam Pomfrey. I was walking around the dungeons, checking as part of my patrol, and I was ambushed from behind and pulled into a classroom. That's all I remember." He knew that this lie would work: it had enough to show he wasn't totally bullshitting it, but still had too little to use a basis for investigation.

Madam Pomfrey finished what she was writing and looked up at him. "Ok, Mr. Malfoy, you may go." Draco started toward the door to leave. "Oh…make sure that you don't patrol alone, we don't want a repeat performance." Draco simply nodded before exiting the hospital wing and closing the door behind him.

To Draco, it seemed he couldn't get up to the dorm fast enough. Sure it was on the top floor and he'd started on the third, but really, did it have to take forever to climb up the stairs? Draco kept on going though; he had to make it there. He kept thinking of how he was going to confront Hermione. When he'd finally made it to the portrait, he still had no idea. He was going to wing it. He said the password and stepped in.

He found her sitting in front of the fire, book in hand, reading. It didn't surprise him that she was reading. What did surprise him, though, was that she had completely ignored his presence. What was she playing at? She knew something and he needed to know what it was. He sat on the couch next to her, though still as far away from her as the couch would allow.

"So…" he started. He noticed that she had closed the book and put it down. She was now looking at him with those deep brown eyes. He'd never noticed how deep they were, like the depths of her soul were completely drowned in them. He was snapped back into reality.

"So?"

"You said you know, so what do you know?"

"I don't know everything…" she said, voice soft and sweet, almost innocent.

"Ok, but what is it that you do know?"

"I know what I heard and I know what I saw." She was purposely being vague, wasn't she? Draco wasn't sure, but he was sure that this conversation was going nowhere and that it would get nowhere if it continued like this.

"Hermione, stop being vague. In the hospital wing, you said you know…tell me what you know."

"Your dad, he beats you…" it was like she didn't want to say it.

"How do you know?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Well, don't get mad, but…"

"Wait" he interrupted her. "Does this mean I'm going to get mad?"

"Probably." She answered truthfully.

He took a deep breath. "Okay. Continue."

"Well, see, last night I was coming down to get a glass of water and I heard you talking to someone but I didn't know who it was and I didn't want to intrude so I sat there and waited, but then I heard you talking about how you didn't want to join Voldemort's ranks and I heard the person say that you had to meet him in the dungeons, then I realized it was your father." She stopped for a second, turned her head to look away from him, and focused on something else. Then she continued.

"So I followed you to the dungeons and I heard your father yelling and screaming at you, but you were just defying him and…and" she stopped to take a deep breath, as if she didn't want to remember. "and I heard something crack and he crucio'd you. So I waited until he left and then I went in to help you, but you were unconscious and, Draco, you looked so broken I thought you were dead." She looked back at him, eyes full of sympathy and care. It was a look he'd never known from anyone.

"What were you doing following me?"

"To be honest, I was worried."

Draco looked at the floor, thoughts running through his head. 'She was worried about me?' This sounded seriously unlikely to him. That's when his mind started thinking the worst. 'She's using this as her chance….she's trying to ruin me.' Of course, he got this idea from none other than the exact plan he had for when he found out her secret. So, he freaked out.

"Hermione…You need to mind your own business." When he said this, he didn't look at her. He couldn't.

"What are you talking about? I'm worried for you?"

"No, you want to ruin me."

Hermione's face was contorted into so many different emotions that it was hard to tell which one would show first. Was she going to yell at him for being a complete arsehole to the one person who cared, or would she just stare at him – past him even – long enough to draw another emotion from him.

"You know what, Draco? You're a pompous arsehole. Maybe you don't know what its like to have someone worry about you, so you don't know how to react, but telling someone to mind their own business when they clearly care enough to have followed you to make sure you didn't die is below low."

Draco could only look at her. She was right of course, but he would probably never admit that. Really, he didn't want her to worry about him. From what he could tell, she had her own mental issues to worry about. He really didn't want to have this conversation with her, and besides, he still had to go get hide the hideous scars left behind from his beating.

He got up and started towards his staircase, leaving Hermione as a ball of fury. She was angry with him, he could tell. 'Oh well, she's not the only one,' he thought. It was then that he heard the last sentence she said,

"You need to stop being dumb. I just want to help you with your problems and you're blowing me off like it doesn't even matter."

"Because it doesn't…" he didn't turn, he didn't stop, the words escaped his lips and he continued on his way.

"Fine," that was the last of what he heard before he got to his room.

He stood in front of the mirror, pulled out his wand, and began vanishing the scars. Of course, he would have to explain to Hermione where the scars went, but that wouldn't be too hard, she wasn't dumb. After he'd completed his usual post-beating ritual, he sat on his bed to think about things. Its funny how it seemed that all he ever did in his free time was think nowadays. But nonetheless, he got lost in his thoughts.

~.~.~.~.DMHG.~.~.~.~

Hermione sat in the bathroom staring at herself in the mirror. She didn't like what she saw, but then again, she never really did. But now was not the time to worry about that. She had to figure out what to do about a certain Draco Malfoy. She really didn't like that he was such a butt, but she still cared.

The floor shook and she heard banging from upstairs. She didn't know what Draco was doing up there, but it obviously wasn't fun. She started to go check on him, but she didn't. 'He wants me to mind my own business, I will,' she told herself.

She knew this was a lie. She couldn't mind her own business, but she also couldn't help him if he didn't want her to. She was stuck between a rock and a hard place, and she very well didn't like it. She thought back to last night, when she had to sleep here in this dorm all alone, but didn't get much sleep because she was thinking ok Draco…

_Hermione walked into the common room and sat on the couch. The fire had already been ignited, as always, so it was warm in the usually cold room. She thought about Draco, she was sincerely worried about him and honestly, she didn't want him to die. What she saw that scared her, but it also raised many questions. _

'_How long has this been going on?''How does he take it?' 'Does it get any worse than that?' _

_To say that they were enemies, she sure was doing a lot of caring lately. But it didn't matter to her, underneath that angry, broken being that was the present Hermione Granger was the Hermione Granger of the past, the one that cared for others before herself. That Hermione made herself known tonight. She pushed her problems aside to help someone else. _

_She was getting drowsier and drowsier as the moments passed, but she didn't want to go up to her room. As she started drifting into dreamland, she continued to think about Draco. When she finally did fall asleep, she didn't have happy dreams. _

_Her mind was filled with thoughts of Lucius: him beating Draco, him killing Draco… She couldn't take it. She jolted awake and sat there, on the couch, in the now cold and dark room. She walked over to the bathroom to splash water on her face…_

Hermione was taken out of her memories by a loud banging sound. She out the door of the bathroom to the bottom of the stairway to Draco's room.

"Draco, are you okay up there?" she asked. She knew he wouldn't answer so she started climbing the stairs. When she made it to his room, she didn't even hesitate to open the door. 'He isn't the only one who gets to barge into others' room when he wants to,' she thought to herself. She didn't like what she saw.

Draco's room was completely destroyed. He was sitting in the corner, head in his hands. 'So this is how he deals with anger'. She started to walk toward him, only hesitating because there was no sound or movement coming from him. She kneeled next to him.

"Draco, if you want to talk about it, I'll listen," she told him. Yes, it was odd to be trying to console the notorious prince of the slytherin house, but he was still a human and even he fell.

Draco continued to sit, unmoving. Hermione didn't know what to say to him. She could only sit there and watch him in silence. After a while, she put a hand on his back to reassure him that she was here. She wanted to hug him, it looked like he needed a hug, but she didn't want to impose too quickly; just because they were no longer enemies didn't mean that they were on hugging terms now.

Draco reacted to the hand on his back. He jumped and pushed her away and she fell off balance. He then got up and walked to his bed and sat there, his back turned to her.

"I'm just trying to be there for you Draco," she told him. She didn't know why she was fighting to help him, but she was, so she continued. "Stop pushing me away."

"Maybe I don't want your help. You have problems, go help yourself. Stop being a nosy bitch," he said solemnly. That sounded like Draco, alright.

Hermione stared at him for a moment. She couldn't believe that he would call her a bitch when all she was trying to do was be there for him. But then again, she could believe it. She started to leave, but then she turned around, she was going to get the last word.

"You know what, Draco? You can't do everything alone. You can't handle everything alone. One day you'll need somebody, and I hope you realize it before its too late." With that, she navigated through the piles of stuff on the floor, walked out the door, and left.

~.~.~.~.DMHG.~.~.~.~

Draco watched Hermione leave. He couldn't believe her. Here was someone that he'd treated like crap from the time her knew her until maybe a month ago, and she was trying to help him. He kept staring out the window, thinking of what he could do. He'd never had someone to just be there for him before.

Even though he was Draco Malfoy, he had feelings too, and currently, one feeling was taking up a lot of his mind. He was sorry. He didn't mean to call her a bitch, it just came out. He didn't know how to react to someone caring.

He looked around his trashed room. It wouldn't be hard to clean, but he didn't want to clean it just yet. He got off his bed and walked around the piles of things. Reaching the door, he contemplated going to sit back on the bed and think, but he continued – out the door, down his stairs, past the bathroom, up her stairs, and to her door.

He knocked on the door; this wasn't the time to go barging right in. She didn't answer, so he knocked again.

"Go away." She said. She was obviously hurt from what he said earlier.

"Hermione, open the door."

"No, I'm just being a nosy bitch."

"Hermione…"

The door opened. There stood a pissed looking Hermione Granger. "What?"

"I'm sorry," he mumbled. It was obvious that she didn't hear him because she asked him to repeat himself. "I'm sorry, okay?" he said. It was really his first time apologizing for something.

"Fine, now what do you want."

"I want to talk about it."

* * *

i know, boring. but it moves us alone in the story yes?


	6. The Truth behind the Boy

**A.N: **sorry it took so long. this was kinda a hard chapter to write, me not trying to make Draco....well, you'll see. (:

**DISCLAIMER: **you know what goes here...JKR

* * *

Previously:

_The door opened. There stood a pissed looking Hermione Granger. "What?" _

"_I'm sorry," he mumbled. It was obvious that she didn't hear him because she asked him to repeat himself. "I'm sorry, okay?" he said. It was really his first time apologizing for something. _

"_Fine, now what do you want." _

"_I want to talk about it."_

Draco couldn't believe what he was doing. It was like he was on autopilot, because the real Draco Malfoy would never have asked for help…especially not from a mudblood. Or maybe this was the real Draco, the one who had feelings and emotions and needed support. Knowing this, though, only led him to know that she was right. He couldn't do this alone, and here was the one person alive who cared enough to stretch out their hand to help him.

The look he gave Hermione was far away from pleading, but it wasn't the look he usually wore. As he stared into her deep brown eyes, he found something urging him forward. "When you said I couldn't do it on my own…you were right." That was probably the hardest thing he'd ever had to admit.

"Draco, look," Hermione started. It was obvious that she'd taken what he said earlier to heart. "You've made it clear that you don't want me to help you. I…" her sentence was interrupted but Draco's voice.

"I know I'm an ass, Hermione, but…" he didn't know what to say. He didn't want to believe he'd totally screwed up, totally sunk so low as to be practically begging her to help him. He dropped his head, at the same time dropping his ego down a hypothetically void of nothingness.

Hermione grabbed his arm and pulled him into the room, kicking the door closed behind them. She then led him to her bed, where he sat down – head still down – quietly. Draco didn't move, he just kept his head down and stared at the floor. He didn't know what to say now that he'd gotten here, he just knew that he needed to get this off of his chest and – oddly enough – he trusted Hermione with this, at least a little bit.

"Draco?" Hermione started in a quiet voice, questioning his current presence. "Are you okay?"

"Hermione… I don't know. I need to get this off my chest, but I don't know what to say." What he said was completely true.

"Well," she said, trying to find a way to get him started. "When did this start?"

"As long as I can remember, but it wasn't always bad."

"What do you mean?"

"When I was younger," he started, remember the first time, "I would be punished for little things. A smack across the face for breaking things or speaking out of turn. Maybe getting hit with his metal cane because my grades weren't as good…"

Hermione interrupted him. "What do you mean not good enough? You had some of the best grades."

"He was mad because they weren't better than yours," he stared into her eyes.

"Oh…" she said something that sounded a little like 'I'm sorry' before he continued.

"Then, after second year, it got worse. He started using the cruciatus on me when I couldn't do it to a house elf. That was the same time I decided that I didn't want to be the heir of the dark lord.

Hermione just stared at him. He didn't know what she was thinking, but the wondering look in her eyes gave him an idea. Finally, she spoke "I never knew you had it so hard. I always though you just got everything…"

"I did, but there was always a price…"

"But Draco…Where are all the scars?"

Draco wondered whether or not he should show her. Of course, he trusted her, but he really didn't want to reveal them.

"Can I really trust you, Hermione?" he asked, attempting to find another solution…he decided he would get it over with and show her.

"Of course," she replied, her voice full of sweetness. 'Wait, sweetness,' he mentally asked himself.

"Seriously, you can't tell anyone." To this she only nodded.

Draco, too, nodded, then pulled out his wand and pressed it against the tip of his head, muttered the revealing spell, and the cover began to disappear. He heard Hermione gasp and looked into her eyes to see all her sweet emotions gone, replaced with horror.

~.~.~.~.DMHG.~.~.~.~

At the sight of his bruises and scars, Hermione was shocked to say the least. She didn't expect them to be so brutal. How could a father be so heartless toward their child? Even if it was Lucius Malfoy, there's always a line that should be crossed. She looked into his eyes, and for the first time, she saw emotion.

He looked sad, but calm. There was just something so different about this Draco sitting on her bed. Something new, she could just put her finger on it…vulnerability. She reached out her hand to touch his marred arm, but hesitated, not wanting to intrude on his personal space.

"Go ahead…" he told her. This shocked Hermione more than the fact that he'd actually come to her. She rested her fingers lightly on his arm. His once soft looking skin was rough, his bruising looked sensitive. A new set of scars ran along his forearm. Honestly, it was enough to almost bring her to tears – almost.

Hermione looked back up at him. Where her instincts had been pushed aside earlier, she now listed to herself. She wrapped her arms around his torso and, to her surprise; he hugged her back, holding her tight to him.

They stayed like this for a while, in each other's arms. Hermione didn't know what the feeling she had was, but she didn't want to let him go. He obviously felt the same, or so she thought until he finally spoke. "Hermione…I have to go" He said, pulling himself apart from her. He got up quickly and ran from the room, leaving Hermione questioning his sudden need to disappear.

She got off the bed and walked to the corner, plopped down into her beanbag, and partook in her favorite pastime…thinking about things. She didn't know what was going on between her and Draco; she only knew how weird things were. She'd just hugged Draco Malfoy…actually she'd just fell into his embrace for a while. Even though she was supposed to be consoling him, she actually took something from him as well – He made her feel safe. She liked being so close to him, though she would never admit it.

She grabbed he diary, but found that when she went to write in it, she couldn't think of anything. Her thoughts were completely focused on the scarred up, bruised Draco Malfoy. At first she wondered what this was – she'd never felt it before. But then she realized what was happening. She grabbed her diary, as she had found the perfect thing to write.

_Diary, _

_I think I'm falling for Draco Malfoy. _

~.~.~.~.DMHG.~.~.~.~

Draco sat in the common room staring into the fire. He halfway expected his father to show up again, but he didn't. About Hermione, he didn't really want to leave her, but he had to get some things straight. Why did he let her touch him? More importantly, why did he like it? He had enjoyed her warm embrace, even more, he liked that she accepted him.

He felt something new when he was with her, and he quite liked it. But what was it? They certainly weren't enemies anymore, but what were they? His mind pondered this for a while before he let it go. He walked over to the bathroom to take a shower, and when he came out, Hermione was there writing I her notebook.

'I wonder what's in there' he told himself. It probably was nothing important, just schoolwork or something, but she always seemed to be writing in it, it was only natural for him to be curious right. As he snuck past her, he had the urge to go sit with her, but decided against it because she was probably mad at him for running out on her, or maybe not.

He lay in his bed, falling asleep, thoughts trained on Hermione Granger.

* * *

**A.n: **anyway, as i was saying before, i didn't want to make draco too soft too fast ya know. also sorry its kinda short, but when i say it was hard, it was REALLY HARD. ok so now its on to teh next chapter (: :)


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